Communicating well across different cultures, backgrounds and experiences is an important skill. Here, experts from across campus give tips on how to navigate these sometimes fraught conversations.
Exercise patience
鈥淐onsciously or unconsciously, a lot of us find it a chore to work with people whose English is not strong. Whether we want to admit it or not, some of us think it is a waste of our time to engage them in conversation. Engaging them calls for intentionality. If we are not thinking about it, then we are more likely to overlook people whose English is not strong. We have to be intentional about hearing from them and aware of our own prejudices. If we truly value other people鈥檚 opinions and believe that they have important ideas to offer, then we need to be patient enough to encourage them to participate.鈥�
鈥擡dem Dzunu, a native of Ghana, works for WashU鈥檚 English 颅Language Program and is founder of Baobab People, a nonprofit that seeks to 颅connect people from different cultures through dialogue and learning.
Show an interest
鈥淢ost people from other cultures 颅appreciate people who show an interest in their culture. You may not know a lot 鈥� or anything 鈥� about certain cultures, so let people know up front. I鈥檝e seen people鈥檚 faces drop when someone introduces themselves and says something like, 鈥業鈥檓 from Myanmar.鈥� [But you can] just say, 鈥極h, I鈥檓 not familiar with Myanmar. Can you tell me about it?鈥� It opens up an avenue of conversation. If something happens, and you see someone reacting negatively to something you said or did, you can say, 鈥業鈥檓 worried I might have offended you. Did I?鈥� But be careful. This could go too far. You don鈥檛 want someone to always be the spokesperson for their country or culture.鈥�
鈥擪athy Steiner-Lang, MSW 鈥�82, is assistant vice chancellor and director of the Office for International Students and Scholars.
Make friends
鈥淢ake friends with a native. That was the first thing I tried to do when I came to the U.S. I was kind of adopted by two American friends, so I got accustomed to everyday life fairly quickly. You really have to accustom yourself to the everyday in a new country: the daily use of the language, how the people behave, how they respond to you. Culture shock really is everything. It鈥檚 very subtle, but it鈥檚 not something that you can describe or name. It鈥檚 just your day in and day out.鈥�
鈥擫etty Chen, associate professor of modern Chinese language and literature and head of the Chinese section in East Asian languages and cultures, moved to the United States from Taiwan when she was in her early 20s.
Listen to understand
鈥淟isten very deeply. Often, we鈥檙e listening and already formulating our response. Also, when we talk to folks from different cultural backgrounds, it鈥檚 important to believe their experience. Often, it鈥檚 hard to hold back shock or disbelief if someone is telling you an experience that may not be part of your experience. Listening to understand is about being OK with the personal narrative. And don鈥檛 be afraid to ask questions, such as 鈥業s this what I鈥檓 understanding from you? What do you need from me?鈥� It鈥檚 OK for us to have some humility and to say, 鈥業鈥檓 not familiar with this situation. I don鈥檛 know if I鈥檓 getting this right, but I鈥檓 going to ask you the question. I鈥檓 going to listen; I鈥檓 going to try to understand.鈥欌��
鈥擡melyn dela Pe帽a is associate vice chancellor for 黑料社 affairs and dean, Center for Diversity and Inclusion (CDI). The CDI provides support for 黑料社s from traditionally underrepresented or marginalized populations.
Focus on the job at hand
鈥淲e studied leaders of community service teams and how the behavior of the leader can either exacerbate conflict or quell conflict in groups where people have different values. We found that if leaders are highly individually considerate, that tends to increase conflict and degrade performance. In contrast, if a leader is more focused on the work of the group and provides more guidance around what the group should be doing, that reduces conflict and leads to better performance. So, let鈥檚 say half the people in a group want to take it easy and the other half think that work is life. If the leader were to encourage everybody鈥檚 perspective, people would feel emboldened to act on their beliefs. As a result, you鈥檙e going to have half the group thinking that their colleagues aren鈥檛 working as hard, and that could cause problems. In contrast, if you have a leader who says, 鈥榃e鈥檙e going to work eight hours today,鈥� then it makes it less likely that the individually held values are going to lead to conflict and disruption in the group.鈥�
鈥擜ndrew Knight is an associate professor of organizational behavior at Olin Business School. One of his areas of research is how to 颅manage and work in teams of people who have different values.
Find what unites you
鈥淲hen you鈥檙e working in a group of people with diverse values, you have to find what鈥檚 called a superordinate identity. Don鈥檛 focus on your own little subgroup of people who have the same values. Instead try to identify some common ground with the entire group. In many cases, that common ground will be the reason people came and joined that group in the first place.鈥�
鈥擜ndrew Knight